Lead with Belief

The lens through which we see things is of the utmost importance. You can look at something as being the worst thing to happen you. But is there a way to frame it as the best thing that happened to you?

For example, being offered a 30% pay cut to relocate for the same position was immediately perceived as a “worst” moment. However, it became a “best” moment when I used it to fuel my exit from that company and position to a better environment.

A few years ago, a friend mentioned a book to me, and the title was immediately familiar.  So familiar that I had purchased the book 10 years earlier, read it and it was now sitting in a box in my garage.

As I read through the book for a second time, it became obvious to me that I was living my life from a position of fear and not of love.  I was not making decisions, I was not speaking up, in essence, I was not living.  I was fearing.

Fear had paralyzed me and brought me to a place where I was going through the motions.  Once I realized I had a choice, that I could chose to live from a position of love, I was in a much different place.

If you live in fear…fear of the future, fear of failure, fear of losing…you are not living. You are hedging your bet, you are leaving things on the table, you are not growing.

In most instances fear does not serve you. Fear limits you and what you are capable. Do not be a slave to fear.

Lighting a match and lighting a candle are similar in that they both produce light. However, there is a big difference between the two.

A lit match provides a spark and will last about a minute until it consumes itself.  It is an exciting moment that produces a short term effect. Lighting a candle may take a while if the wick isn’t set perfect.  However, once lit, it will last a long time.  The slow burn allows you to keep your eyes open and see what is in front of you.

The things in life which are worth it are more like a candle, as opposed to a match.  You need to be in your relationship, your business, your passion for the long haul in order to reach the payoff.

Yes, you will need the occasional match, but make sure you light some candles along the way so you can see your dreams come true.

A child is in the kitchen with their mom making meatloaf. The child asks, “mom, why do you cut the ends and do the meatloaf?” The mom responds, “I don’t know that’s the way grandma always did it.” So they give grandma a call and ask her the same question and get the same reply. So they proceed to visit great grandma and ask her the same question. Great grandma is finally able to shed light on the issue and informs them….”It wouldn’t fit in the pan!”What meatloaf are you carrying around in your personal and professional life?

Tick, tock, tick, tock…….The clock is ticking as the deadline looms.  We have to move fast in order to get everything done on time for the company’s top strategic project.  In the midst of the fury, my boss calmly suggests I do a two day summit where I pull the entire team, spread across the country together.

I proceeded to give him the “are you crazy?” face and said something to the effect of “how am I going to get this project done if I have two days of meetings and have everyone to travel in?”  I don’t have time for this.  He shrugged his shoulders and acknowledged that I knew what was best.

As the work day wound down and night came, the thought kept coming….why would he suggest something like that? Is he crazy or am I? 

Sometimes, you need to move slow to go fast was the only answer I could think of.  It started to make sense.  While pulling people in would cause them to go slow for those two days, getting everyone aligned and clear about the goals, roles and plan would allow them to go fast for the remainder of the project.

Success was ours!  Sometimes you need to move slow to go fast.

There is only one person you can be and that is yourself.

You may be able to please some people, some of time by doing what they like. However, you can’t give up being yourself to please other people.

So get comfortable with who you are, focus on improving you and moving yourself forward. Act in accordance with your beliefs and desires. Be true to yourself.

If you have ever been skydiving, you know the second you step out of the plane is complete chaos.  You start hurdling towards earth, the noise as you split through the air is intense, the wind smacking your face is fierce.  In a sense it is pure chaos and some may even say crazy.

As the earth gets ever closer, the chaos remains.  The only direction is down, and the only speed is fast.

However, once you pull the ripcord everything changes.  The chaos vanishes in an instant.  The noise is replaced by silence, the speed goes from incredibly fast to smooth and controlled, and you go from directionless to able to steer.  The journey changed in an instant.

You can now fall softly to earth, directing yourself to the target.  The chaos is gone, replaced by the calm.  You are now in control of the rest of the journey.

While life may seem to be out of control, smacking you in the face and unable to hear through it all.  Remember, it can all change in an instant and bring you exactly what you want.

Things come at you from all directions.  So where do you put your focus?  You need to do the important things not the urgent things. Urgent may feel good as it allows you to take care of an immediate need and perhaps be considered a short term hero. However, in order to win the long game you need to focus on the important things.

Typically when you first start working “work hard and keep your head down” advice is doled out.  Many years into my career I started to ask what’s so good about keeping your head down?

In keeping your head down you can easily miss what is going on around you. And people can easily miss seeing what you are doing.

Try picking your head up and see what is happening. What is out on the horizon? What is not working? Where can you be more valuable?

Go ahead and make the transition from heads down to heads up!  Let me know what you see with your working heads up.